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How can I ask my partner if they have any STIs?

I really enjoy reading your answers on these pages, but here's the question that I haven't seen addressed on your web pages or anywhere else on the Internet. Can you please suggest some appropriate ways to ask a person with whom you're about to have sex if he or she has any sexually transmitted diseases? A few months ago, I met a girl with whom I had sex... and, as I found out later, she had herpes. We did use condoms anyway, but there was still some risk in catching herpes since we didn't use condoms all the time.


What contraception can I use if hormonal birth control is not an option?

I have a blood disorder (leiden factor V) which prevents me from talking any form of birth control with hormones in it. This is a problem as I am very paranoid about getting pregnant, I would like to have a child at some point, but not for five or six years. Condoms just seem to risky, and diaphragms and female condoms don't work well for me. So I'm not quite sure what to do. I am able to take the plan B pill, and wondered if I can just take it after having sex. Or if there are any other options out there I would love to know about them! Thank you!


Should I tell my friend that I'm worried about how she sleeps around?

My friend has only been at college for two weeks, and she has already had sex with several guys. She is having safe sex, so it's not dangerous in that sense and she claims to be enjoying herself. However, it seems to me that such behavior is unhealthy and damaging to one's emotional state and reputation — but I'm not sure how to explain to her how I feel, or articulate what is wrong with her how she's acting. Do you think what she's doing is wrong, and if so, how should I confront her?


What about emotional abuse?

I notice in your mental health section, you only have info on sexual abuse. What is emotional abuse? I've heard a lot about it lately, but it doesn't seem very real to me. How can simply being called names, or whatever, be as devastating as people say? Short of being threatened with murder, what people say is just words. I can't seem to find very good articles about emotional abuse on the web.